Daniel Susco
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Drunk Driver Reminds Us All Why We Shouldn’t Drink and Drive as She Takes Tree For a Ride

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I would like to start out with an obvious statement, which we seem to reiterate over and over: drunken people aren’t very good at decisions. That’s why we keep having stories like one that happened last November, when a drunk man called police to help him start his car because he couldn’t figure it out himself. Then, of course, there was that Florida woman who was arrested for driving drunk because she was livestreaming the whole thing on Periscope. Finally, you can’t forget the drunk driver who betrayed man’s best friend back in October when, after a police chase which ended when he crashed into a house, he claimed that he hadn’t been driving drunk, because his dog had been driving (although there was no dog in the car or the scene).

However, despite the condemnation and mockery these drunk drivers received and the contempt of Helen Mirren, drunken people continue to drive and do stupid things.

A little after 11pm on January 23rd, police in Roselle, Illinois, received a call from a motorist who had just seen something extremely worrying about another driver’s car. Officers were able to quickly find and stop the car in question, summing up in the report exactly what had been so worrying:

“Stopped for driving with a large tree embedded in the front grille.”

Since we are new to Facebook, we were not quite sure what to expect from our post. We have received requests to post the video from this call. Some just didn’t believe it was true, so we have attached a short video of this call.

The first portion of the video is in slow-motion and shows the car traveling in the opposite direction; the second portion shows the officer trying to stop the car and then as he approaches the driver. Yes, it is true and it happened!


Posted by Roselle Police Department on Monday, March 7, 2016

The woman driving the car was apparently so drunk that, after plowing straight into a tree (which broke off at the base and became stuck in the front of the car), she decided that there was nothing for it but to just keep going, brandishing her car’s new landscaping in front of her.

She was cited for driving under the influence, but I have to say that the best part of this has to be shortly after the officer stopped the tree-laden car, when he walked up to the window, and then just kind of pointed to the car’s impromptu hood ornament. We don’t know what exactly he said, but I see the conversation going like this:

The officer asks, a little incredulously, “Do you know why I pulled you over?”

“No, why?” replies the woman.

“The tree.”

“Oh, right. That.”

Tree in car

“Yeah. That.”
Photo: Roselle Police Department Facebook

Don’t drink and drive.

News Sources: Roselle Police Department via Facebook, Chicago Tribune

  • Daniel SuscoEditor

    Daniel Susco is a native of the Dayton-Cincinnati area, and has written on a multitude of subjects. He can discuss Shakespeare, expound on Classical Mythology, and even make witty jokes about Pliny the Elder (More like “Pliny the Rounder,” right?). In his free time, Daniel enjoys reading, cooking, woodworking, and long walks on the beach (just kidding – sunburn is no joke). See more articles by Daniel.