Indiana Man Arrested While Driving a Topless Minivan Flying Confederate Flag
Have you ever sat alone in your study among your volumes of classic literature and your expensive paintings and found this emerging from your inner-most thoughts: I bet that if I took a minivan and cut the top off the thing, it would open up all sorts of possibilities—literally and figuratively!
But your thoughts don’t stop there. They proceed: Ooh! Ooh! Aaaand! It would also make it like a butt ton easier to haul my hog around town, for those, ya know, just-in-case kinda moments.
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Then, as you chuckle to yourself, sniff your wine, and thumb the pages of the Proust book in your lap, another thought invades: Also, even though you’re from the state of Indiana, a state which was critical in the North’s victory during the Civil War, you should fly a Confederate flag from your chop-top minivan. Because, you know, it’s art. Like transgressive art. Not because you’re a dense racist or anything, but because you believe in art.
Finally, as your body wills you to leave the comfort of your den and guides you to your van keys, you are moved by one last suggestion: Oh, you should also get really high first and then take your drugs with you.
Does this sound like you? Then CONGRATULATIONS! You are almost certainly Levi S. Stetler of Angola, Indiana. This means that you were arrested last Saturday by the LaGrange Marshals Office for operating while intoxicated with a controlled substance, possession of marijuana, and possession and paraphernalia. It also means that your plan for a totally sweet motorcycle-hauling, Confederate flag-flying chop-top van absolutely paid off.
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News, Photo Source: LaGrange Marshalls Office Facebook page