Kyle Johnson
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Kars4Kids’ April Fool’s Gag: Give Us a Car, We’ll Give You a Kid

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Kars 4 Kids April Fool's

Perhaps you have heard of Kars4Kids, the car donation program that has raised $100 million for charity by accepting approximately 450,000 cars and recycling around 240,000 of them. Typically, donating a vehicle nets participants a 3-day, 2-night hotel voucher and, because of Kars4Kids’ 501(c)(3) status, a receipt to use on your next tax return.

Today, on that holiest of days for those who have jokes, Kars4Kids decided that it was going to chip in by using a more literal interpretation of its name, promising to give you a kid if you give them a (k)ar. Admittedly, most April Fool’s jokes floated by brands and companies are pretty lame, but this one is actually pretty genuinely lol-worthy, if only because of the effort put into it. Like this video:

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The best part is the guy in the Emerson hoodie who traded in his ’96 Buick LeSabre for a kid who he clearly does not know what to make of. Give that man an Oscar.

The video concludes by telling the viewer to browse Kars4Kids’ “Kidventory.” Sure enough, if you go to, there you’ll find it.


Click on the child of your choosing (I went with “Tiny but Tough” because he appears to also come with a sloth), and you are directed to a survey that determines your parental compatibility. Rate your accommodations, the healthiness of your dinners, whether you think you’d be able to help with finishing homework, rank your strictness between “Free Range” and “Helicopter,” and name your preferences—including dairy-free, vegan, gluten free, respectful, mature, friendly, smart, cute, and musically-inclined.

Completing the survey gets you a surprisingly uplifting message, but it no doubt comes as a disappointment for prospective adoptive parents looking for the cheapest path to parenthood.

April Fools Page Kars 4 Kids

Not bad, Kars4Kids. Not too bad at all.

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Kyle S. Johnson lives in Cincinnati, a city known by many as “the Cincinnati of Southwest Ohio.” He enjoys professional wrestling, Halloween, and also other things. He has been writing for a while, and he plans to continue to write well into the future. See more articles by Kyle.