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Meet Terry Brouillette, the Luckiest Man Alive

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Terry Brouillette

When Jennifer Rodriguez was told to drive it like Tony, she took it to mean something else entirely

It’s that time of the year where young boys and girls lay awake at night, staring up and out their windows and making wishes to the stars in the hopes that Jolly Ol’ St. Nick might hear. We’re fairly certain that this does not describe what 71-year-old Terry Brouillette of Worcester, MA was doing when a drunk driver slammed through his bedroom wall this past week, but given his obvious enthusiasm for NASCAR and motorsports, it’s not entirely impossible that Santa didn’t just deliver Brouillette a new car in the absolute worst way possible.

Brouillette was fast asleep, no doubt with visions of Tony Stewart doing donuts in Victory Lane dancing through his head, when a Subaru Legacy crashed into his bedroom wall and just barely missed crushing him beneath the wheels.

Terry Brouillette

Terry Brouillette has the best 10-year-old’s bedroom ever

Jennifer Rodriguez was the driver of this particular vehicle, and police allege that she was driving drunk and without a license. To cap it off, she also gave a false name to officers arriving at the scene. Let’s hope she at least had the good sense not to say her name was Danica Patrick.

Through it all, Brouillette keeps a good sense of humor about the whole thing, noting that he could have changed Rodriguez’ oil from his bed and using some colorful language when trying to figure out just how she managed to plow through his house, asking “how the hell can you pick up that much [expletive] speed from Vernon Street to here?”

His best reaction, however, comes when he recounts Rodriguez’ only words to him after the accident. According to Brouillette, she simply told him that she was sorry. His reaction:

Terry Brouillette

*insert cackle here*

Somebody start a GoFundMe and get this man a new wall and an all-expenses-paid weekend trip to Talladega, stat.