Sex While Driving is What The Kids Are Into in South Dakota These Days
Last week, a $100,000 safety campaign that advised drivers in South Dakota not to abruptly jerk the steering wheel was ended after numerous complaints about its suggestive title. Despite the fact that Don’t Jerk and Drive was about 2500% more effective than the Department of Public Safety’s previous campaigns—which includes some vaguely sexist tripe that perpetuates the “dumb blonde” stereotype that we all remember from 5th grade—it was yanked because, for those of you who may not be aware, “jerk” is also a euphemism for masturbation.
Turns out, jerking anything may be the least of South Dakota drivers’ worries. The bigger issue, according to a professor at the University of South Dakota, might just be an act that takes two to tango.
“There are people getting killed out there because they’re having sex while driving, either with themselves or with another person,” Cindy Struckman-Johnson told the Argus Leader. “If they’re getting killed, we have an obligation to understand it.”
Yep. Sex while driving: scourge of South Dakota.
According to a paper co-authored by Struckman-Johnson with her husband Samuel Gaster, one third of all men attending USD have engaged in some kind of sex while driving a vehicle. Nine percent of all female respondents admitted to similar acts.
Further, more than one third of all drivers admitting to having sex behind the wheel said that they were speeding while doing so—half or more said they were traveling at speeds ranging between 61-80 mph at the time, another third said that they had drifted from their lane, and 11% admitted to letting go of the steering wheel altogether. Two percent said they nearly got into an accident.
Why do something so dangerous and irresponsible while driving?
“One of the students wrote ‘it’s a five or six hour drive home,” said Struckman-Johnson. “What am I supposed to do?”
One word: Serial.
News Source: Jalopnik
- Kyle JohnsonEditor
Kyle S. Johnson lives in Cincinnati, a city known by many as "the Cincinnati of Southwest Ohio." He enjoys professional wrestling, Halloween, and also other things. He has been writing for a while, and he plans to continue to write well into the future. See more articles by Kyle.