. Ellen Ripley. Wolverine. Han Solo. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Teddy Roosevelt. There’s something you have to admire about a man whose love of public discourse is so great that he will gladly deliver a ninety-minute speech with […] "'Pin It")
The Luigi Death Stare is the Best Death Stare
We, as a culture, are fascinated by badasses. Snake Plissken (he leads the list because of course he does). Ellen Ripley. Wolverine. Han Solo. Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Teddy Roosevelt. There’s something you have to admire about a man whose love of public discourse is so great that he will gladly deliver a ninety-minute speech with a sucking bullet wound in his chest while taunting his would-be assassin by saying “it takes more than that to kill a bull moose.” The only way that could have possibly been more incredible would have been if Teddy slipped into a Power Loader to deliver his speech and then shot Greedo first.
President Roosevelt then closed the proceedings by telling the gathered press to get off his lawn.
When we think of badasses, nobody is particularly quick to think of Luigi. At best, Luigi is the afterthought when one considers his brother Mario, even if he is coming off of having his own year. Unfortunately for everyone’s favorite second banana, the Year of Luigi ended back on March 18, and two weeks later, Nintendo announced an operating loss of $456 million. Nobody said that it was because of Luigi, but nobody went out of their way to stand up for the guy, either. 
How does Luigi feel about that? All you need to do is watch the cold, heartless death stare he throws at opponents in Mario Kart 8. Those eyes tell the whole story. 
Here, have all of the videos featuring the Luigi death stare in all its glory. All of the videos. All of the glory. All of the Luigi death stare. Have a look at a bunch of wonderful GIFs (via NeoGAF) that make the case that Luigi is legitimately a badass. Don’t agree? Does he look like he’s playing? 
Well, except when he occasionally gets faced by Donkey Kong. To be fair, most people get faced by Donkey Kong at some point in their lives. 
Luigi even gets his own cliche “walking away from a fireball and not flinching” moment. 
The Year of Luigi is over? He’d like a word, I think. 
Kyle S. Johnson lives in Cincinnati, a city known by many as “the Cincinnati of Southwest Ohio.” He enjoys professional wrestling, Halloween, and also other things. He has been writing for a while, and he plans to continue to write well into the future. See more articles by Kyle.