World Cup of Cars: Portugal vs. Ghana
All eyes…well, at least any eyes able to sneak away from work for a long Thursday lunch…will be on the final Group G matchups in preliminary play, which includes Portugal vs. Ghana. If you’re reading this in America, here’s what you need to know: Ghana will knock the USMNT with a multi-goal win over Portugal, and the US is through in the event of a Ghana loss or draw. The only way that Portugal gets through is if Cristiano Ronaldo sprouts wings pre-game, alights gently at midfield with a football-launching cannon, and scores approximately 15 goals on his own before being swept up in a beam of divine light. In other words: there’s a chance.
And while our World Cup of Cars matchup for Portugal vs. Ghana is not quite exciting as the world’s most talented and most devilishly handsome footballer descending to earth on a cloud like a totally ripped version of the archangel Michael, we’re nonetheless excited to see the Fiat Punto square off against the Tata Indigo.
Oh. My.
(Steps away to look over information on both the Fiat Punto and the Tata Indigo)
Hm. Okay. Well, here we go.
The Fiat Punto. It’s…a Fiat. It comes in three different trims: EASY, LOUNGE, and YOUNG. Four available engines include diesel and bi-fuel options and…well, it’s a Fiat.
CAR HERE! THAT’S ME, JUST BEING A CAR.
Looks like a Fiat. Yep. Fiat all up in here.
I AM A CAR
To the Tata Indigo which…
ALSO CAR
-
- HELLO I AM A CAR
-
- YES, THIS IS CAR
-
- NOT A BIKE
-
- SEE? LADY LIKE CAR
Oh boy. Well, it’s a car. With four wheels. And a windshield. Can’t forget that. Also, lights! So that you can see at night. Is the Tata Indigo a car? Definitely. You’d be crazy to say it wasn’t.
So who wins? Well, this might be somewhat unprecedented, but we’re declaring neither the Fiat Punto nor the Tata Indigo the winner. The winner here: Cristiano Ronaldo’s abs.
You win the World Cup of my heart
They win, we win. You’re welcome.
Be sure to check out Portugal vs. Ghana now, now, right now on ESPN2. Go. Go!
The News Wheel is a digital auto magazine providing readers with a fresh perspective on the latest car news. We’re located in the heart of America (Dayton, Ohio) and our goal is to deliver an entertaining and informative perspective on what’s trending in the automotive world. See more articles from The News Wheel.