April Fools’ Day: Acura Is the Top Luxury Brand…Alphabetically
Sometimes automakers can be funny, and sometimes they can be downright horrifying. Luckily for Acura, they’ve fallen toward the more funny side of things and have left the horrifying up to GM, which recalled over 6 million vehicles in one month.
I know what you’re thinking: “What? Acura, funny? Next you’re going to tell me Lincoln has some semblance of a personality.”
But as Honda is my witness, it’s true. Acura pulled a mean funny today (although, I must concur, Lincoln remains as bland as ever). In a press release posted to their media site, Acura introduced some exciting news: Acura is the top luxury brand and has been for 28 years, based on alphabetical ranking, beating out the likes of Audi, BMW, Mercedes, and Lexus.
“At Acura, there are many things we’re proud of, and one of those things is our alphabetic dominance. I mean, these are the A-B-Cs of marketing, and no one does it better than Acura,” said Mike Accavitti, Senior Vice President and General Manager of Acura. “Audi has been nipping at our heels since the beginning, and then there was that deal with Amati, which never really had a shot. We even toyed with adding another A on the front of the name, but we’re confident that we can maintain our leadership, assuming no one comes along with Abalone or Aardvark or something like that.”
And while I would give anything to say I drive the new Aardvark SRQ, my money is on Acura to take the cake in 2015 as well, although we could see a strong fight from Audi and returning competitor, Alfa Romeo.
“We probably should have called it the A-TLX,” Accavitti added. “But it’s still a damn fine vehicle, even if it’s not first in the yellow pages.”
Timothy Moore takes his leadership inspiration from Michael Scott, his writing inspiration from Mark Twain, and his dancing inspiration from every drunk white guy at a wedding. When Tim is not writing about cars, he’s working on his novel or reading someone else’s, geeking out over strategy board games, hiking with his pooch, or channeling his inner Linda Belcher over beers with his friends. See more articles by Timothy.