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Possible Travelling Wise Man Found Walking Naked Along Highway

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According to details of an arrest affidavit out of Florida, a man probably named “Nathan” was arrested for walking naked along a major road.

The story gets really weird from there.

Indian River County Sheriff’s officials responded to several 911 calls saying that there was a naked man strolling down the sidewalk along US route 1. One deputy spotted the naked man, and as the deputy approached, he could hear cars driving past honking at the man.

The naked man simply gave them a thumbs-up.

Thumbs up

The universal sign for “I acknowledge that I am naked, thank you for your input”

Upon questioning, the man said that his named was Moresto M. Garcia (a fake name, it was later found), but that he didn’t know his date of birth or Social Security number, telling police that his father was “some kind of gypsy” and didn’t tell him. He said that day was his first in Vero Beach.

According to “Garcia,” he had been staying in some girl’s house and she had kicked him out without his clothes. He said he didn’t know where she lived, who she was, or even what her name was.

For that matter, he said that he had no identification whatsoever and that they couldn’t even look up his tax records, because he had never paid taxes or had a job. He has always been travelling, he said. He didn’t know where he had been, though, after police asked. Instead, he just said that he always ended up where he needed to be.

Scruffy-looking guy in sunglasses

Presumably, he followed this by saying that he didn’t live in America, because he lives in the moment

So, the dilemma becomes, is he an outrageous liar, or a travelling wise man who hasn’t yet come into his band of loyal followers?

Liar, as it seems. After taking his fingerprints, officials determined that he might be 24-year-old Nathan Forrest Richardson of Rockledge, Florida, which is more or less 60 miles north along the coast. The man also responded to the name Nathan and looked like a mugshot provided by police in Brevard County.

So, police charged him with exposure of sexual organs and giving a false name.

Still, we like to think that somewhere, wandering across the vast wastes of the Floridian coast, walks a man with the mind of the gods, whose footsteps leave behind enlightenment even after they are swept away by the ocean’s waves.

Man staring at his shoe

When you get right down to it, what does shoe even mean?

Or, you know, some dirty naked dude who lies a lot. The choice is yours.

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