Superstar Limo: The Story of Disney’s Lamest Ride – Pt. 2
Photo: Neon Tommy via CC
In part one of this story, we discussed the history behind what might be Disney’s lamest theme park ride: Superstar Limo. We talked about the events that led to the creation of California Adventure, the initial plans for the car-themed ride, and how the tragic death of Princess Diana changed those plans. Now, it’s time to find out what Disney did next, and why the resulting ride ended up so terrifyingly awful.
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The new Superstar Limo
Although multiple alternative attractions were discussed, Disney had to face the fact that their budget was practically nonexistent. In the end, the decision was made to take what little money was available and try to fix Superstar Limo. The new concept slowed the ride down to a snail’s pace, eliminating the roller coaster elements. No longer a high-speed chase, the new version would eliminate references to the paparazzi, change the story, and include more gags and Hollywood in-jokes.
The retooled concept was terrible, and Disney’s Imagineers knew it. However, Disney’s CEO, Michael Eisner, loved the obscure references and immediately greenlit the project.
A horrifying ride
On Feb. 8, 2001, Superstar Limo opened with Disney’s California Adventure. Guests’ first glimpse of the ride was its show building, which was crudely decorated with 2D plywood cutouts of Los Angeles buildings. The budget was so low, that this aesthetic would extend into the interiors, as well.
Once guests boarded their snazzy car, the ride began. This is where the terror truly started. Once the vehicle started moving, a nightmarish puppet appeared on a screen in the car. Introducing himself as your agent, he would tell you not to be late for your big Hollywood premiere. The vehicle then entered a crude plywood recreation of Beverly Hills, where it became clear that the entire ride was a puppet-themed nightmare. Caricatured celebrities appeared throughout the ride in the form of cheap figures with little to no movement. As you travel through Sunset Strip, Bel Air, Malibu, and the backlots of multiple movie studios, an army of creepy animatronic celebrities greet you. They included Regis Philbin, Melanie Griffith, Antonio Banderas, Cindy Crawford, Tim Allen, Jackie Chan, Drew Carey, Cher, and Whoopi Goldberg.
The ride concludes with your picture being taken, your agent praising you, and the realization that you just wasted your time.
The aftermath
Unsurprisingly, the ride was immediately met with a negative response. The experience was considered far below Disney’s standards, and its cheapness was obvious to guests. The Imagineers that worked on it were also reportedly embarrassed by the results.
On Jan. 11, 2002, the ride was closed for good. It lasted less than a year. While it’s rare for Disney to close an attraction with no replacement in mind, the Imagineers didn’t care and simply wanted the ride gone. Superstar Limo sat abandoned for four years as ideas were tossed around for a re-theming. Ideas involving Mickey Mouse, Goofy, and even the Muppets were discussed, and then discarded.
Finally, in 2005, California Adventure received a massive 1.5 billion dollar renovation. As part of the changes, Superstar Limo was officially transformed into “Mike & Sully to the Rescue,” a Monsters Inc. ride. This quick fix opened on Jan. 23, 2006 to praise and relief from guests.
However, there’s one final, horrific wrinkle to this story. Since the Monster’s Inc. re-theming was a budget makeover, much of Superstar Limo was simply painted over for the new ride. The cheap cut-out buildings were replaced with cut-out doors that matched the aesthetic of the movie. The track layout remained the same, and the Limo ride vehicles were repainted as taxis.
But this is where the nightmare fuel really kicks in. As in the Monsters Inc. film, the new ride is filled with yellow-clad CDA agents. But underneath the suits are the stripped down, repurposed bodies of the celebrity animatronics from Superstar Limo. That’s right: one of those agents is really a beheaded Drew Carey. Yikes.
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Did you ever get the chance to ride Superstar Limo before it was put out of its misery? Let us know in the comments below.
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