Kyle Johnson
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Sexy Mario Mercedes Commercial is Weird

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The square-jawed interpretation of Mario is like Zack Snyder's pitch for a gritty Super Mario Brothers reboot.

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Mario, have you been working out?

At the press conference held today to announce that there will be a Mercedes-Benz GLA available as DLC in Mario Kart 8, Nintendo and Mercedes also made it a point to unleash the following Mario Mercedes commercial:

We get a little bit of everything here: the Mercedes-Benz GLA is rendered in 8 bits and tears through the first level of Super Mario Brothers. This, despite being somewhat sacrilegious, is definitely fun to see.

And then we get, uh, sexy Mario.

Mario Mercedes Commercial

*swoon*

Yeah. A buff, hunky version of the stout, shlubby plumber steps confidently out of the GLA wearing an outfit that looks like it was Zack Snyder’s choice for an eventual gritty Mario reboot. Actually, I should take that back before Snyder goes and gets any ideas and decides he wants to ruin more great things.

Mario Mercedes Commercial

“The world will look up and shout ‘make a good movie,’ and Zack Snyder will look down and whisper ‘no.'”

Sexy Mario, who could be Nintendo’s answer to the “Sexy Jesus” controversy that circled the film Son of God, is all butt-chin and smoldering looks…right up until he stumbles haphazardly into a GoombaMario Mercedes Commercial

and gives the camera this look.

Mario Mercedes Commercial

Aieeee!

Still, it’s got a bit more potential than the ham-fisted, pseudo-cyberpunk nightmare that was the actual Super Mario Bros. film (no disrespect to the sorely-missed Bob Hoskins).

Check back in for the latest developments from the Nintendo/Mercedes collaboration as they become available. With any luck, this won’t be the last we see of the Sexy Mario Mercedes commercial series. I can only imagine that the next entry will involve Sexy Mario beating Bowser by eye-f*cking him into a lava pit.

Mario Mercedes Commercial Gallery